Liqor & Love Discovery
by Br0ken-Heart
Summary: After the break up with Ryan Marissa seems to be completely broken , she finds another way of coping with this. A way which doesn't ONLY involve booze. A little R/M Mostly Malex.
1. Chapter 1

_So this is my first ever written Fanfic :)_

_It's most probably gonna be Malex with a bit Ryissa ;)_

_So the story is pretty simple, i hope the language is also ok. I didn't let it recheck by anybody...so i don't know._

_Oh and well English is not my mothertongue, so if you find any mistakes just let me know and I'll correct them._

**Title: Liquor & Love Discovery**

**Fandom: The O.C.**

**Ship: Ryan/Marissa/Alex**

**Warning: None (so far)**

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Chapter: 1

**The Lifeguard Stand**

I was staring out of the window. It wasn't the sunniest day in Orange County, California. It was rather cloudy and dark. As i walked down the street, I looked over at the front door of the Cohen's mansion.

I sighed. Why was life like this? Why did it never work out? It never did and I don't think it ever will, I'm tired of trying to make it work.

As usual I opened the door to the liquor store near the Pier, where they sell booze to minors. I took one bottle of vodka and two bags of cigarettes. I walked over to pay.

I started smoking a while ago, as well. I keep destroying my body with every possible means. The reason fort hat was simple: A broken heart equals a broken body. A love lost. I guess everybody knows what I'm talking about, since everyone has experienced exactly this or at least something similar before, I suppose. If I had known, what this pain would do to me, before, I would have never given my heart away. Especially not to someone, who took it for granted and didn't worship it.

I've been suffering for 5 months now and it didn't get any better. Well, actually, it got even worse, everyday.

I walked down the stairs to the beach, with the bottle in my palm. This is my daily routine. Buying booze plus cigs, then walking down to the lifeguard stand S 49 and drown all my sorrows in alcohol and nicotine. I used to drink vodka with orange juice, but since two weeks I prefer drinking it pure. That's the date when I started smoking also. Drugs is not a big subject though. I haven't tried much, only coke once and weed a few times. I got it from my sister, but she went back to High School. So I guess, if I feel the urge to get high and numb all the pain that is hidden inside me, I have to search myself a new dealer.

So anyways, I walked across the beach, almost hovering over the sand. I wasn't completely there, my thoughts always drifted away. The sand was warm, although the sun wasn't shining. It hadn't been shining form e ever since he had a new girlfriend. Two weeks had passed since then.

Well it's not like i didn't hook up with anyone in these 5 months. I've just never been in love again. And it still makes my heart ache seeing him be happy with another girl, he apparently really likes. I've had boys, too. Plenty of them actually. But I've only been using them for my own pleasure and replacement of the love of my life. I might even broke some hearts, but right now, I couldn't care less. I didn't care about anything much, lately. Especially not about myself, but when i think about it, I never took responsibility for my actions and I never took care of myself, either. I always had people do that for me. Well, until I chased them all away. I always lose the ones i love and actually care about. Only because I force them to protect me and save me all the time. It's not like I'm forcing them literally, they just have to, because I'm always getting myself in trouble somehow.

I'm a chronic mess, I know that, but I still need people around me to protect me from myself and from everything else, as well. But somehow they all get worn out and exhausted by the pressure of the responsibility to save me over and over again. I'm like a little kid you're not allowed to leave on her own, because I'll manage to hurt myself in some kind of way. I guess I can't expect people to rescue me constantly.

My mom tries to cope with me with sending me to a therapist. But not because she wants me to get better, but because she doesn't want to deal with me and my issues, anymore. Not that she ever did. So she's sending me there, however, I'm going. That's basically our relationship. I never really talk to this psychiatrist, he only listens to my made up stories. I'm not sure if he actually buys it, but well, he doesn't bother to actually ask, thus, I don't care.

When I arrived at the lifeguard stand, I saw shoes. Shoes belonging to a person. A person sitting in my place. My place. It's mine. No one is supposed to be there, except me. No one.

I stood still, stopped breathing. I think I cramped my hands around my bottle and I felt a slight heat burning up from my stomach to my throat. I was getting mad. I felt it was some dude, I'd definitively beat him up. I learned to defend myself against attackers. He… He said I needed to learn it „just in case". Right now, it was this case. I might haven't got attacked literally physical, but someone stole my place, my place of relief, my sanctuary.

This just wasn't acceptable, not at all.

I took a fag out of the box. I played with it in my hand and lightened it in my mouth. I felt the calmness floating through my body. Cigarettes always calmed me down when i got rage blackouts or mood swings. It felt good, it always felt like cigarettes blew life into my hollow body. I took another deep drag and then I walked towards the stand to see what kind of person I was going to chase off.

I was still focused on the shoes. Converse. Black ones, shoes which that dork Seth Cohen would be most probable to wear. What a coward must this be?

I could steal a glance at the pants now, as well. Dark blue jeans, skinny jeans. What kind of guy wore skinny jeans if he wasn't gay or sissy? It was easy to assume I was going to fight off a weak, effete dude. Too bad, he was probably just in the wrong place at the wrong time.

His head was leaned back, so I couldn't see his face. But what i could see now that I've moved closer were his hands.

I couldn't believe what I just saw. Was this guy doing manicure? He wore black nail polish and his nails were shaped and smoothed, his hands looked very soft in general, as well.

I was confused. Who was this?

So i walked closer just to see „his" face.

She had long fake blond hair with one purple streak. She didn't look as sissy, now that I actually saw her face. She had this determined look on her face. Though she looked kind of lost. If this contradiction was even possible. She wore leather bracelets on both her wrists. Suddenly she opened her eyes and let out a soft sigh. Her head went back forth.

I was so surprised of her sudden movement that I just stood there frozen. I totally forgot about my previous plan.

I'm not gonna punch a girl. Guys, yes…Girls, no.

I blew some smoke in the air and watched her. I waited for her to respond and or apologize for taking my place without permission.

But all she did was looking at me. Her eyes burned into mine like ice. If ice can burn.

They were blue-grayish. Dark circles framed them in their perfect shape.

I was still waiting for her to answer or at least say something. She turned her head back and suddenly had a confident smile on her lips. I could see one row of white teeth glinting between her rosy lips. Apparently she wore lip gloss. I didn't put lip gloss or lipstick for more than two months now and I suddenly felt how much I missed it. I always liked the taste of lipstick on my mouth.

_„So are you gonna sit down now or do you wanna keep analyzin' me?"_

Who the hell does she think she is? First stealing my place, then not moving away or apologizing and now this. She thinks she could boss me around? How did she even know I was analyzing her looks?

_„Well this is my place."_ This just sounded damn silly. I could slap myself in the face right now.

_„Oh it's your's Ma'am? Then I offer a humble apology. I shan't occupy other people's places, indeed."_

I wasn't sure if she actually meant what she just said. I sensed a bit sarcasm, but I couldn't be completely convinced it was. She looked actually sorry. Then she made a move like she was actually going to leave. I already had a self-satisfied grin on my mouth. Yes, again. Marissa Cooper won.

_„Did you actually think I was going?" _She stood in front of me and raised one eyebrow. Her hands placed on her waist. Suddenly I didn't feel all winner. She still glanced at me.

_„Um…Yes?! Look this is my place ok, you can't just come and butt in, alright?"_

_„Oh well, too bad. I already did. Only 'cuz you're one of these rich Newport Princesses doesn't mean you freakin' own this place. Either you accept me being here or you leave yourself. That's the deal. I'm not going anywhere"_

This chick really started to piss me off. And you don't want to see me when I get mad.

She still stood very close to my face. One eyebrow raised, but now her arms were folded provoking.

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**So let me know what you think about my little story :)**

**Don't be too mean since it's my first, okay? :D**


	2. Chapter 2

_So here it comes :)_

_Chapter Two_

_I know, it's pretty short but well I believe I transmitted every necessary detail so we don't need more ;)_

_Let me know what you think...alright?_

**Title: Liquor & Love Discovery**

**Fandom: The O.C.**

**Ship: Marissa/Alex**

**Warning: Language (partly)  
**

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Chapter: 2

**Vodka and Cigarettes**

She was incredible, but not in a good way. I was getting pretty aggressive, but when I looked at her face I just saw she was really determined and none to fuck with. There were only two possibilities:

I could just walk off defeated

I will remain here with this chick, sharing my place

I wanted neither of the above, to be completely honest, but I figured the minor bad was staying. Since I really needed to get wasted soon, I wasn't feeling so well, so I stayed. I wouldn't let her chase me away from _my _fucking place. I wouldn't let her win, I wouldn't let her get this gratification.

I rolled my eyes and shoved her to the side to make my way down. I settled on the ground, at my usual place. I didn't look at her at all, I just kept this state of sedateness. I still had my cig lightened so I took a deep breathe and blew some smoke in the air around myself. I loved to watch smoke rise up and swirl until it just fades away.

I closed my eyes and just enjoyed the sudden silence and calmness of the moment. Like I said, cigarrettes always calmed me down. They almost made me apathetic. My anger turned into indifference.

I think she felt i was softening up. As she sat down next to me I could feel her glances all over my body. I hate when people check me out while they think I'm not paying attention. It's just stupid, because I do. I always feel it.

„_What?"_ I could feel just how she felt caught in this moment. A slight satisfaction made its way towards my soul.

„_Can I bum a cigarette?" _I gulped. This was what I asked Ryan, the first time I ever met him.

Sounds like déjà vu to me. I turned my head towards her. As against my feeling there was no sign of guilt in her face although I caught her checking me out. She just grinned at me. Apparently she didn't care at all. I realized she had dimples when she smiled.

I handed over my packet of Dunhill's. I opened my bottle of vodka. _Welcome my friend, nice to see you again. _I pulled the bottle of clear liquid towars my mouth, as I got interrupted again.

„_Do you have matches or a lighter?"_

„'_K wow, you really know how to annoy people, huh?"_

„_You already gave me a cig, so why wouldn't you lighten it for me?" „Ughh…"_, I let out a sigh just to show how hacked off I was.

„_Fine, be like that! I'm just trying to make conversation with you, you anti-social Newport Princess. By the way I'm Alex" „First of all I'm not a Newport Princess, second of all who cares who you are? Just let me drink, okay?"_

„_Yes, you so are one of these Newport Princesses. I mean, look at your hair, your clothes, even your liquor is no tone of the cheapest…"_

„_So what's wrong wearing expensive stuff. It's just more comfortable and suits me better…"_

„_Yeah, right. Whatever…Newport Princess"_

„_Okay stop teasing me…_Alex_…"_, I was saying her name with disgust.

She rolled her eyes but she couldn't hold a laugh back.

„_What's so funny?"_

„_You're cute…"_

„_What?! No, I'm not."_

„_Yes, you are. With the way of defending yourself, like as if you had to apologize for where you're coming from. I don't judge people who are spoilt or anything."_

„_Well, it sounds like you are…"_

„_I'm not. I just like to tease people, but I never mean it."_

„_Ughh, whatever. I'm not talking to you. You stole my place"_

She let out a giggle. Apparently she found that funny again. Why was everything funny about me? I'm not fucking funny, not at all.

„_Stop laughing at me"_

„_You're hilarious, With your__ naivety. I already told you, only 'cuz your dad might have payed for this whole area, doesn't mean it's yours."_

„_My dad didn't pay for anything. He just left us with nothing…"_

„_Yeah, nothing than a huge mansion, with a pool, a park, a bar, a whole household of employees…nothing"_

I rolled my eyes again and stared at the ocean. The waves weren't as strong as I used to know them. The weather still sucked. It even looked like rain a bit.

I never rained, not in Orange County.

I took a big gulp out of my bottle. As the liquid flowed down my throat I felt it burn in my body. This feeling of relief, of numbness. I layed my head back at the backwall of the lifeguard stand. I let out another slight sigh.

„_So um…will you give me your lighter now or not?" _

I woke up from my solitude.

„_Fine, there" _I leaned over to lighten her cigarette, well, _my_ cigarette actually.

She moved closer as she put her fag on her lips. I took out the cig from my mouth and laid it on the floor. I held my hand around Alex's cigarette and the lighter so the wind wouldn't blow it out. I lightened it and i could feel her sucking on it. One more time. She breathed the whole smoke in and blew it out. You could see a huge cloud of smoke occurring from her mouth. She turned her head to the side and looked over at me. She smiled. How could I make a person so happy just with a normal cigarette?

„_Thanks…Um…What was your name again?"_

„_I didn't tell you…"_

„_So then, tell me now."_

I took another sip from . My husband.

„_Marissa"_, I responded slowly, wondering if it would even matter who I was. _„Doesn't matter."_, was another answer.

„_It does. Nice name, by the way. Marissa, the Newport Princess"_, she grinned again at me. I had no idea why she was teasing me like this. I mean, it really got annoying after a time and I wasn't in a good mood anyways.

I didn't respond this time. I wouldn't want anymore witty jokes of her about me being naive or cut or a _Newport Princess_. As the time passed by, I realized I already drank more than half of my alcohol. There weren't much left of the fags, either.

After a while I really started feeling the liquor in my body. It was like this drug to me, I was addicted, but yet I loved the fact to be dependent on such a great feeling. It always relieved me and made me feel good and it numbed the pain. It also numbed every other part of my body, but I didn't care. I stopped caring about myself at a very young age, already.

When everybody decided to just let me down, I didn't see any point in caring about myself anymore, either. My head was spinning and I felt like I was going to throw up. But I hated puking so I braced myself and pretended to be alright.

„_Are you okay, Marissa?"_

I wasn't able to properly answer anymore, so I just left it as that and didn't answer at all. I just nodded.

„_You sure?"_

She looked worried. Why did she even care? What was there to take care of? I'm a mess and everyone knows that. But why the hell does she look so worried? I'm not even her friend or anything. We've just met. I was thinking about what we talked about, but I couldn't remember one single bit. Evereything was just a blur.

As I drove through my memories I was passing out.

Everything revolving around me just turned into black. A big black nothing.

I felt like I was moving into this huge black dark spiral, with no way out. It pulled me in and it felt like I could never get back out.

It's not like this hasn't happened before. I was already used to this. Apparently Alex wasn't…

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**So this is it so far  
**

**Please review :D**


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3 finally up. I don't know if I'm being too fast with the plot and everything just let me know what you think.

This time the POV of Marissa changes into Alex's

So don't get all confused about this, but I felt like letting Alex tell you guys what she experiences with Marissa, since marissa can't quite tell you...

Please leave some nice comments I want to know if I'm supposed to keep this story up, or rather not.

so leave some reviews alright? :)

**POV: Alex**

**Title: Liquor & Love Discovery**

**Fandom: The O.C.**

**Ship: Marissa/Alex**

**Warning: Alcohol Abuse  
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Chapter: 3

**Nothing**

I shook her.

I was startled.

I shook her.

I tried to wake her up.

I shook her, again.

I didn't think it would go this far.

I shook her as hard as I could.

What happened? I've seen people pass out before, but they were always kind of there…still.

„_Marissa?!",_ I yelled again. _„Wake up! Wake the fuck up!"_

I checked her breath once again.

Nothing.

Pulse.

Nothing.

Heartbeat?

„_Marissa, can you hear me?"_

She isn't gonna die, she's not gonna die just here.

When I figured she wasn't waking up I searched for some kind of cue to her address.

God, where does she even live? This Newport chick could have her mansion ANYWHERE.

Where the hell was her ID?

I looked for it everywhere.

Nothing.

Silence.

I opened the leather jacket of hers. She was wearing some red top thing, which really suited her, but I had no time to think about that now. Where the hell could someone keep their address?

The pocket in her jacket. I unbuttoned the little pocket and finally found her ID:

_Marissa Cooper_

_4944 Pelican Grove_

_Newport Beach, CA_

Thank God! Now the only problem is taking her home. I will have to, she passed out next to me. I felt kind of responsible, no idea why. She's not even my friend, but I can't let a passed out remain here on her own. I knew this area. It's not the best one to pass out. This spot of the beach was often missused as some kind of dealing area, I knew that from experience…

There was no way I left this girl here on her own. She might have acted very bitchy, spoilt and conceided but also broken, depressed and very low. I had a thing for broken girls. I don't know why. Don't ask. I feel the need to save them, somehow. I'm attracted to dark people. They allure me, they make me feel protective and there is nothing I wouldn't do fort hem.

But this was different. I didn't know this girl at all. I had no connection to her.

Nothing.

But she somehow fascinated me with her cold, dark facade and attitude. Who was she?

Now I knew her name and her address. She was passed out in front of me, no idea how I was supposed to carry her home. It's not like I'm that strong. I'm a surfer and I do work out, but I never really did any heavy lifting. Not that she was fat, not at all. She was rather thin, too thin. But that was only part of her sullen appearance, I supposed.

I had to make up my head about saving this girl. I didn't intend to let anyone die today. Me, Alex Kelly, I was supposed to save her.

I felt it was going to deteriorate so I quickly decided to just lift her up. She wasn't as weighty as I thought. But maybe that was only the liquor. I definitivley had drunken too much of Newport Princess' vodka. Although it was nothing compared to what she drank.

I didn't know that these Newport chicks could throw down. I think she was different. Somehow.

When I moved to Newport two weeks ago, I got this fantastic impression of this place. Everything seemed perfect. But I soon realized, it wasn't. Even if you run away, you'll always take your problems with you. You can change where you're going but you can't change where you'recoming from. That's what I realized in a very short matter of time.

This world.

It just wasn't for me.

Everything is fake. Fake smiles, fake happiness, fake kindness, fake bodies, fake everything.

I never wanted to become fake. But in this place it was hard not to give in. All this shallowness this attitudes, rich spoilt kids driving their daddy's mercedes benz', while other people, like me, have to take a rotten job just to not starve.

I was a bartender in some flophouse called „The Baitshop". Even the name sucked. We barely had any guests and the manager only bossed me around. I wasn't in a good mood and then the thing with Jodie.

I moved here with her to run away from the place I came from. Everything seemed to get better here.

Wrong.

It became worse.

In short: She left me for some rich dude, she found here. She said he was all kind but also a _bad boy_. Yeah, right. As if anything wasn't fake here.

Fake feelings, fake reputations, fake people.

But I can't keep grieving over my past, I have to look forward and move on. Just let go, Alex, I told myself. Let go.

I left it all behind, now it was nothing to me.

Nothing.

Jodie.

Nothing.

God-damned job.

Nothing.

At least I could still trust myself, even if no one ever put trust in me. I was supposed to be happy. I deserved to be happy, maybe not with Jodie. She didn't seem right for me anyway. How could she leave just like that? For some adopted rich kid, who _„came from the same bad background as us"_. Who was going to belive that? Definitively not me.

Jodie can have him. I'll live my life on my own.

I've moved on. I hate to see people throw their lives away, that's why I didn't do it myself.

And I couldn't let that happen to a stranger, either.

As I felt her body sank into my arms, I felt like I finally did something right in my life. It was the right decision to take care of her. I know how she felt, I've been through a lot myself. So I decided to help her. At least for tonight.

She was very light, but tall. Her long light-brownish hair fell over her face so I couldn't exactly look at her. I put her hair away so I could see her better. Freckles. How cute.

I laid her arms around my shoulders, so it would be easier to carry her. Her hands were so soft, but appeared without any sign of life in them. She wore black nail polish. So did I.

I bend underneath her. It wasn't easy carrying a passed out drunk fuck-up.

I knew her address. It wasn't that far. Near the place I worked.

Fucking Baitshop.

I knew this was going to be hard but I was confident to make it. Obviously I wouldn't get any help. So I just HAD to make it on my own. I still felt responsible. I would have wanted her to do the same for me. Although at this point I wasn't quite sure if she'd actually do it. But I didn't care. This was about me and _my_ choice, _my_ decision, _my _addiction to rescue people. My weird urge to help whenever someone doesn't feel well or seems to be in trouble. I mostly got myself in shit with that attitude, as well. I was a hard-head and I don't think I was able to change. I always do what I believe is right, for me, for others. I always did what was necessary, at least in my opinion. Sometimes I put myself back, just fort he benefit of others. But I guess that's just how I am. Take it or leave it.

I carried her home. When we arrived at her driveway. At least I hope it was hers. I felt exhausted, but yet relived because I knew I did the right thing. She didn't even had to know my actions to make me feel satisfied. I was confident with myself.

When I arrived at her house, I realized how huge it was and how much I wanted a safe home myself. But I didn't had it, so I decided to just ignore it. This luxury and everything it was just

Nothing

to me.

I came closer to her front door and it took a load off my mind when I saw the name _Cooper _written on the doorbell. I rang the gilded bell and listened to its calming sound. I think this was the first time a bell actually made me feel comfortable. But maybe it was only becasue I was tipsy and I usually don't rang some people's doorbells when I was slightly drunk.

I waited a few seconds and rang again. I felt Marissa's condition wasn't getting better, it actually worsen, but at least I felt a pulse again.

I was checking fort hat every here and then.

Finally the door swung open. A good looking woman appeared in the entrance and looked at me rather startled and shocked.

I'm sure I wasn't looking much better than Marissa did.

Two fuck-ups.

I'm pretty convinced I would have gazed the same way this woman did right now.

So I didn't know what to say so I just started babbling.

„_Miss Cooper?"_

„_Yes, that's me. What did you do to my daughter?"_

„_I didn't do anything, I found her that way."_ A little white lie was more adequate to this situation than the actual truth that me and her were drinking and smoking on the beach. At midday.

I totally lost count of the time. I didn't know if it was late afternoon or still midday or even evening. The sky didn't give me any closure either. It was looking dark and rainy all day.

Her mom grabbed Marissa from my shoulders, I actually didn't seem to endure it any longer, anyway. So I was grateful when she finally carried her inside.

I heard noises like stepping on stairs or something. It sounded like really heavy steps.

I didn't care, I was about to leave since I only wanted to make sure she was getting well.

As I turned around to walk down the drive way again I heard voices screaming after me.

„_You found her? Where"_

„_Beach", I simply answered._

„_You carried her here…Alone?"_

„_Yes Miss."_, I was getting annoyed. It's okay I did a nice thing now thank me fort he rest of my life but let me go.

„_Who are you that you helped her?"_

„_Doesn't matter"_

I had to giggle a bit about this irony, since it was exactly what Marissa told me when I asked her about her name.

„_Oh no Lady, I want to know who you are"_

„_I'm Alex."_ Right after I said those words I turned around again and left a puzzled Miss Cooper behind me together with her passed out daughter in the house and walked off.

If I ever get the opportunity to meet her again?

I wasn't as confident as I was when it came to saving her.

Probably I was nothing to her, just like she was supposed to be nothing to me, either.

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**So this is it for now**

**no idea if its good**

**I need feedback :D**


	4. Chapter 4

Sorry for the long wait but i was really busy with personal stuff...

So I changed back to Marissa's POV again like it's supposed to be.

It's in the middle of the night here in Germany so I hope I didn't make too many mistakes but I can't really see clear anymore, either.

I'm like Marissa hahaha

So obviously you all know where this is going...

subscribe and review please

i lalalaloveeee feedback

**Title: Liquor & Love Discovery**

**Fandom: The O.C.**

**Ship: Marissa/Alex**

**Warning: None**

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Chapter: 4

**I Don't Care**

As I awoke, I felt my head exploding. Well obviously not literally. I felt a rush of nausea coming up so I threw away the blankets and immediately ran to the bathroom.  
As I pushed my face into the toilet bucket I wondered how I got home. The last thing I remembered was drinking at the beach and I met this girl.

I combed through my memories I remembered her name: Alex. I'm not quite sure who she actually was, but I didn't care too much either.

Another trace of nausea overcame me and I had to puke again. Eww, I hated vomiting. But it was inevitable after drinking like I did.

I grabbed some of the toilet papers and cleaned my mouth with it.

Yuck!

I got up and leaned over the washbasin and sighed softly. I looked up in the mirror in front of me. What have I become? I remembered a time when I actually felt something like happiness. But that was long gone. It's all a big blur, the Marissa then is not at all comparable to the Marissa from today. The Marissa who drank like a hole, smoked like a chimney and fucked around with everyone. What has happened to the old Marissa, I asked myself.

_"Oh I know…She got her heart broken…"_, I said to the mirror. I actually whispered it, but you could still hear it though.

I opened the mirror cabinet and took out my purple toothbrush. I looked for the toothpaste and finally found it laying on the ground next to some empty shampoo bottles and a lipstick.

No idea where that stuff came from, seriously.

I brushed my teeth to get the disgusting taste out off my mouth. I grimaced and wrinkled my nose. Hopefully I didn't had to puke again. I got my hopes up too soon, though. After a few seconds I had to put my head in the toilet bowl once again. Same procedure all over again. Taking out the toothbrush and the toothpaste, brushing my teeth again. I finally felt a little bit better, although my stomach said different. It felt empty, but there was no chance I was going to get something to eat, though.

I closed the mirror cabinet again still staring at my reflection. I closed my eyes and tried to think of somebody else.

Ryan.

Again.

It really starts to get annoying after a time. Why was I even putting myself through this? It's not like I'm getting back to him with this kind of attitude. He fell for the Marissa from the past and not the present one. Nobody fell for the one that looked back at myself right now.

I was disgusted by myself. How could I let myself down like that? I'm sure Ryan wouldn't want me to grieve over him all the time, he would want me to move one. But I guess it's harder to say and to actually do so.

I walked out of my bathroom when I heard my mother yelling from downstairs. I rolled my eyes and locked the door to my room so she couldn't enter. I closed my eyes once again but this time not to get a clear mind but to shut up the noises which were arising in my head. I definitively got a headache and was not at all prepared to face the fury also known my mom.

I couldn't deal with that right now so I crumbled back to bed and wrapped myself into the blankets. As I heard her knock at the door to my room I just lifted a pillow up and put it back in my face just to not hear her again. After a while of ignoring she probably understood I was not going to talk to her. I never did. In the last few months I didn't really talk to anyone than myself and that girl I met yesterday. But I didn't really care about talking to anyone.

I slept for a few hours and then woke up again. I looked at my alarm clock and saw it was already 8pm. Time to get up.

I crawled out of bed and almost fell over some empty beer bottles which still lay on the floor. They must have been a few days old already. I walked across to the window since my room kind of started to smell after cigarettes and liquor.

I walked around in my room for a few minutes until I finally managed to pick my thoughts. I moved closely to my closet and opened the wide doors. I looked inside but there was nothing actually catching my attention. Maybe it was because I didn't really know where I was going tonight anyways. Well I didn't even know what day it was. Yesterday I must have started drinking at midday and the store I bought it from was open, which means it definitely wasn't Sunday. Ok, so that wasn't helping at all. Anyways, I was going to go out tonight no matter what day it was. I just randomly took out some black ripped shirt and my white skinny jeans. I figured they were also ripped, but not because of style, I probably fell down somewhere and ripped my pants and the knee parts. I didn't care too much.

I quickly put on the shirt and jeans when I looked for my biker boots. They were laying underneath my bed so I had to get on my knees and grab them. Now the only thing that was missing was make-up and my leather jacket. I found it really quickly it still lay on my bed from last night. Or, well, from yesterday.

I went over to the bathroom and put on make-up. I figured I put a tiny little bit too much, but as usual I couldn't care less.

I was almost ready only the last detail was there yet. My flask. I searched it in my whole room when I finally found it behind a nightstand. I shook it. Empty. I rolled my eyes, obviously it was empty. I went back to the bathroom and rinsed it and then immediately refilled it with some _Jack Daniel's _which I found lying on the ground. I took a big sip out of the bottle and the brown liquid almost flowed down my chin because I drank it too jerkily. I wiped the liquor off of my chin with my sleeve. Now let's get this party started.

I grabbed my purse and stormed out the door. I almost stumbled as I rushed down the stairs of our huge mansion. I took a look around and figured it was actually a beautiful place, but I never appreciated it before, so why would I do so now?

I slammed the big front door behind me after I picked up the keys of my car. I walked down the steps to the drive way. I clicked on the little button on the car keys and directly heard the sound of my car being unlocked. I jumped in and putt he keys into their matching place. I pressed my foot on the gas and drove away.

I drove around for a while and looked for a good place to get myself smashed. I already had order to stay away from 80% of the clubs in Newport Beach. But I wasn't known by all of them yet. So I drove a bit longer until I finally found a good location to take my rest.

I stopped the car in front of a shabby looking bar-thing, whatever it was.

Iook out my keys and opened the car door, at this moment I wasn't so sure anymore if this place was right for me. But when I saw a few fucked up looking people loafing into the club I knew this was exactly where I was supposed to be.

I slammed the door of my black Chevrolet and locked it, in this area it was not the best idea to leave your car unlocked parked somewhere.

I glanced over at the dim light shining from inside the club. It wasn't as bright. Good, since I was still a bit hung over I wouldn't have wanted any over-lightened discotheque, at all. There was music playing really loud, wasn't my type of music but at least it wasn't some clubbing shit, it was rather chill and kind of alternative, actually not what you would expect from a mainstream club, right?

Well, the only thing that wasn't mainstream about this building were definitively the type of people walking in there. They all seemed kind of fucked up or broke and with broke I mean no money. They actually looked like hobos, but I didn't care I wasn't here to hook up with some dude anyways. I just wanted cheap liquor and chill music and this place totally seemed suitable fort hat kind of plan.

I walked across the parking lot and arrived at the entrance. Against my expectations there was no bouncer to check the crowd walking in, so I supposed there was no need to check us. I passed a few guys by who were almost drooling at the sight of me.

God, how I hate guys.

As I walked in I saw just a bunch of people hanging around at the bar. My destination.

I had to cross a whole empty dance floor to make my way through the mass of non existing people. Wow, I don't think I've ever seen a club as empty as this one. I didn't care, as long as my fake ID would get accepted I was all content. My first aim was convincing the bartender of my age. I put some sad attempt of a seductive grin on my face when I started to focus my destination.

Again, this club seemed to be different from the others.

_"What can I do for you?"_

The bartender didn't look up and just waited for my answer of and order. The bartender was, contrary to my expectations, a woman. She seemed similar and as she looked up still waiting for my answer I instantly recognized her. It was the girl from the beach.

She looked rather startled and confused. Nothing to compare to her self-pleased look yesterday. She didn't look too happy to see me again. Well no wonder, I just met her and passed out right at the beginning. Well, no one invited her to remain at my place and no one told her to stay or to communicate with me, either. But I didn't care.

She raised an eyebrow, just like she did one day earlier.

_"May I see your ID, Miss?"_Ok, this was definitively _not_ how it was supposed to be.

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**So this is it for now.**

**I don't really like this Chapter, but it was a necessary one so sorry if you find it boring but I needed to get Marissa to The Baitshop hehe**


	5. Chapter 5

_Sorry for the long wait ppl :S I was reaaaally busy_

_but now that I got a lot of shit figured out I'm able to write again_

_so I kinda like this chapter _

_if im too fast u gotta tell me cuz im not too sure about where this is going_

**Title: Liquor & Love Discovery**

**Fandom: The O.C.**

**Ship: Marissa/Alex**

**Warning: Language**

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Chapter: 5

**The Baitshop**

I was officially fucked. Either I had remembered to take my fake ID with me or I was going to sip on soda throughout the whole night.

Ugh, why was she even working here, she didn't have the right to judge me o to control my drinking , I would actually consider myself of being an addict, yet I didn't want to stop it and get a hold of myself.

I grabbed my purse and rummaged around in it for my ID. The fake one obviously.

I looked up and saw Alex being pretty amused about this silly and kind of awkward situation. She saw me pass out yesterday and now she was the one holding me back from experiencing it again. That was kind of paradox, I thought. I almost dumped my whole purse but all I could find was my flask, a lipstick, a box of ciggarettes and my car and home keys. I figured I forgot my ID at home and I could literally slap myself in the face fort his stupidity.

I looked back up to Alex as saw that she was already leaning from one foot on the other in anticipation of seeing my ID-card soon.

But she wasn't going to see it. As another few embarrassing moments passed by I offered a coke. Apparently she couldn't hold a smirk back as she shoved the glass of liquid across the counter. I quickly grabbed it and turned my head around to find a quiet spot to settle for the evening.

This club had a huge stage, but no one was actually dancing. They had a live band as well. The music was quite endurable so I just walked over to some chill-looking lounge and sat down on purple leather seats. The couch was contrary to my expectations very comfortable. I couldn't believe it but I was starting to actually like this place. But that feeling quickly went away as I saw the glass or coke in my hand.

Ugh, coke. But I still had my back-up plan, which was in my purse. I zipped it open and took out the shiny silver flask and unlocked it. I directly feeled the biting smell of Whiskey coming up my nose. I took a deep breathe and inhaled the liquor. I poured the brown liquid into the other brown liquid I was still holding in the glass. No one would ever find out since brown plus brown equaled brown, so no one would notice.

I leaned back into the seats and made myself comfortable listening to the chill music. It pretty much calmed me down.

I was sitting in complete solitude because I wasn't feeling anyone else around me. I felt safe and relaxed. That was what I really needed.

My little sanctuary was soon to be destroyed though.

"_Hey you…" _I opened my eyes and looked into a familiar face.

Not her again, I wasn't in the mood for talk. Well, I actually never was. But especially i did not want to talk to her, she's the reason why I could only drink my Jack and nothing more. Thanks a lot…

"_Hi…"_, I responded without any indication or looking at her. _"So you're feeling better?" "It's none of your business, is it?"_, I said avoiding the blonde once again. _"Well, no not really. But kind of…I mean, I don't know." _She was definitely squirming, I had no clue why, though. It's not like I was her responsibility or my business would mean anything to her.

"_What do you mean?"_, I asked her. I had totally no idea where she was getting at.

She sat down next to me on the purple couch. She was making her comfortable and didn't look like she was actually going to tell me what was up with her. But it's not like I cared, I was just curious. She stroked her hair back with her hand, still wearing black nail polish. She was wearing the _typical "The Baitshop" uniform _which was a black t-shirt with a small emblem on the right above her breast. Speaking of her boobs, they kinda made me jealous. I was pretty tall and lanky, which meant my tits weren't the biggest, obviously. But her, she was totally smaller than me and definitely athletic and fit. I kept on sneaking little glances at her, since she was not making any attempt of answering my question. Her jeans were dark blue and very tight. My glances went back up again. I saw she closed her eyes just enjoying the music and the atmosphere existing in this area.

I took another gulp from my Whiskey-Coke and kept checking her out. My senses were already numbing. I felt her breathing next to me, her body moving up and down in a very calm way. Wasn't she supposed to be at the bar and work? Well, probably not, since no one was really in this lousy flophouse.

Her chest moved slowly up and down and it kind of made me feel safe with her. There was something about this girl, which made me feel safe and comfortable in some kind of way. As I kept looking at her face, her body, my eyes concentrated on her breasts. For sure I was already tipsy or slightly drunk. I would have never ever stared umm…there.

Her boobs were nicely formed but they started to blur in front of my eyes. The whiskey was definitely working. Alex displayed her breasts with an admirable nonchalance, neither flaunting them, nor pretending they weren't there. I think I liked the way she held herself, she seemed to be so down-to-earth but yet kind of different than the others. No one ever made me feel safe just with their pure presence. It was crazy. Well, but I was drunk, so this meant nothing. But god, she was just so…

In this moment she suddenly opened her eyes and turned her head towards mine. She moved closer and I was actually getting a bit nervous because I didn't know what to expect from this chick. I was raising both of my eyebrows in expectation of her next action. She moved over next to me and her face came dangerously close to mine.

Against my expectations of her kissing me, she just whispered something in my ear, but I wasn't sure if I understood her correctly.

I believe she said something like: _"I carried you home yesterday"_

I shook my head in disbelief. How could she possibly carry me home? She was smaller and I don't think she was strong enough to carry me all the way from the beach to my house. Wait, why did she know where I lived? I never told her.

"_W-What"_, I mumbled. _"Yes Marissa, I took you home. You um…"_ She looked down at her knees. _"…you passed out next to me. Um well, I couldn't leave you there. I mean. I don't know you, at all, but hmm I dunno. Do you even remember me?" "Yes, yes I do. But I…I didn't know you were um…you actually…hmm. Err, thanks"_, wasn't as pissed at her no more, it was actually pretty sweet of her to take me home.

"_You're welcome…Newport Princess"_, with that and a smirk she leaned away from me but she still rested her eyes on mine. I smiled back at her. No wonder, she didn't wanna give me any liquor tonight. I never paid attention to how i got home, or who took me home, if I walked by myself or with other people. I never actually cared. But this girl just randomly met me or well, I met her and she immediately took me home when she felt like I wasn't okay. That was pretty…impressive, I'd say. Maybe she wasn't the ho I thought she was.

I looked at her, she was still smiling. _"What?!"_, I asked with my usual monotone voice. I didn't have any expression in my voice because I was already slightly drunk and I didn't really know what emphasis I wanted to give my talk.

She gave me a smirk, no it was more something like a leer. _"Nothing"_, she only mouthed it and smiled again. I definitely needed another drink. I took out my flask to put a bit more into my glass which was apparently almost empty. At this moment her smile faded. She looked at me in confusion and unbelief. C'mon it's not like you never seen anyone drinking out of a silver flask, right? She seemed so, I don't know how to describe it. She seemed kinda innocent but yet rebellious, if that combination was even possible.

Her eyes pierced into mine and she suddenly made me feel guilty. Wow, I wasn't getting a bad conscience, was I? I didn't know what to do, but since the booze already poured into my cup it was quite obvious that I wasn't going to waste it. Apparently she also thought so. She asked me if I was always drinking that much and I just nodded in agreement. She said she wanted to show me a place where I didn't have to drink to numb my pain.

I didn't believe her. But as she offered me an open hand i just randomly took it. I was so drunk I was barely able to be aware of what I was doing. Our hands were locked. On the one hand I had Alex's in the other one I had my drink, so it kinda seemed like I had to choose. So I did. My glass was already empty and as far as I remembered I didn't had no more liquor left. Additionally I was sure that I wouldn't get anything in _The Baitshop_.

I followed Alex as she pulled me after her. I stumbled and I had to stop occasionally, because everything around me started spinning and blurring. It seemed like we walked a lifetime. It took me ages, as well, to realize we weren't even in the loungy area anymore.

Alex had taken me to her…I didn't know what it actually was. Obviously it was a room, four corners, a floor and a ceiling. It looked kinda chill, there was a couch/bed thing in one of the corners. The couch was covered with orange drapery and looked very comfortable. In contrast to the other subjects in this room. There was no window. No real decoration, except a few band posters hanging on the wall and a green plant which didn't seem like it was watered too often. The tiny room offered a particular working atmosphere. At the back of the room just at the opposite side of the couch there was a huge working place. A desk, a laptop, a safe, a lot of built-in cupboards, a few photographs and a lot of lamps.

I looked around for a few seconds just until Alex managed to get out a few words.

"_So this is my office"_, she turned to me smiling. I didn't notice she already pulled her hand back. I felt so safe with her hand being wrapped in my own hand, now that it was gone I kinda missed it. Wow, I must be so fucking drunk. No words. I'm still the bad ass girl she met on the lifeguard stand, I will not let her see my sensitive side. If it was even a side. I was still convinced it was definitely the liquor.

"_Do you like it? It's more quiet than the club area"_ She smiled again and looked around as if she was really proud to have her own little place.

"_Umm, I don't know"_ Well, what was I supposed to say? I didn't even know her, or her job and I totally wasn't interested in her office. Right?

Alex raised one eyebrow, like she always did; and just kept looking at me and then changed her direction back to her room, which was slightly lightened in a warm smooth orange tone.

I knew my head was spinning, but apparently I wasn't aware of how bad I already was, again. I felt a slight upcome of nausea so I had to sit down. The only real seating option I had was either the office chair in front of Alex's desk or the comfy couch.

I chose the couch and let myself fall down on the soft orange cloth, a pillow next to me. I wondered if she also slept here…

If so, I'm sure it wasn't a very calm sleep, at all. A bed next to a club with loud music, she must really love living this rocker life style. For me it just counted that the couch I was sitting on was relaxing and cushy.

Out of nowhere she pulled a TV in the room, probably to make me even more comfortable, or to get my thoughts off of alcohol. Whatever it was, it was good.

Alex sat down next to me. Her warmth next to me erased my depression. I felt like her presence had something exhilarating something … addictive. Also her smell was intoxicating and very attracting, actually…

In this moment she leaned over and started talking to me or something. But the words all blurred in my head, so I had no idea what she actually said. I just nodded in response, I was too tired and drunk to actually care about what I just agreed to.

Alex immediately stood up. My face turned into a worried grimace. What did I say?

She walked out of the room and left me there, all alone.

Fuck, why did she go? I didn't even intend to chase her away. Okay, I might have acted really cold this whole evening, but well, deep down I really was mushy. I didn't wanna hurt her. Although I pretend like I don't care about anyone or anything in the world and especially not about some people's feelings, I actually never intend to harm someone. But I guess I did.

I intended to get up and leave, where was the point in staying? It was around 0.30am and I wanted to go to another place to finally drink the fatal drop and pass out.

Just in time Alex came back. I heard the lock of the door and it swung open. She walked in with a big bright smile on her lips and carried something I could not define.

Oh, it was a blanket. Wait, a blanket?

I must have looked pretty confused or startled because Alex let out a little giggle and winked at me. I still didn't know what was going on, but I couldn't care less. A vast approach of fatigue overwhelmed me. Not that it suddenly appeared, I was tired the whole evening, but I didn't notice.

I made myself comfortable, because there was clearly no other way. I could not walk out, since she locked the door after she came in. She wrapped me in the black blanket and caressed my arm and my shoulders to warm me up. I didn't realize I was shaking, because of the coldness. But apparently Alex noticed, so I figured she asked me if I was cold, or if I wanted to stay over. Whatever it was, it didn't matter. I was too exhausted to think about anything.

I knew she was still next to me when I was drifting away into a land without worries.

I fell asleep and so did she.

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**so what do you think??**

**feedback is more than welcome :))**


	6. Chapter 6

_OMG im so so sorry for updating that late_

_I was sooo immense busy lately i had noooo time to write_

_but i hope you enjoy the new chaper and let me know what u think ;)_

_next time theyll go out to EAT ahahah im sorry i just had to put this pun ;P_

**Title: Liquor & Love Discovery**

**Fandom: The O.C.**

**Ship: Marissa/Alex**

**Warning: Language**

* * *

Chapter: 6

**Enjoy the Silence**

I woke up with my head laying next to the most beautiful person I had ever met. My face was rested on her shoulder and I could hear her breathing slowly. She was so amazing, everything about her was special. Her perfect hair, her rosy lips, her tiny little nose, her blue eyes. I kept wandering with my eyes. Then I looked around in the room, it was so familiar and it made me feel so comfortable, but maybe that was just the sleeping beauty next to me. I knew I had done the right thing. I remained laying next to her on the couch still not knowing what I was actually doing with her. I knew I had fallen hard fort his girl, ever since I met her at the beach. I never thought I'd ever enjoy the presence of one single person so much as I did with her.

_All I wanted_

_All I needed_

_Is here in my arms_

_Words are very unnecessary  
They can only do harm_

I suddenly had this song in my head and I couldn't get rid of it. The problem is, if I'm really attached to a song or if I it just burned into my mind, I start singing. Not very loudly, but loud enough so that other people could hear it. It was more like mumbling. I enjoyed searching for new songs, new bands, new genres; and lately I heard this song and immediately fell in love with it. _Love_ that was one word I never really spoke out loud, I even avoided thinking about it. I got hurt once and I wasn't intending to let that happen again.

_Words like violence  
Break the silence_

_Painful to me  
Pierce right through me  
Can't you understand  
Oh my little girl_

I did not want to wake her up, but I think I heard her breathing a bit louder as I started my little singsong towards her. She was moving and I enjoyed the feeling of her waking up to me.

She squirmed and bend as if she wasn't sleeping too well, but I guess that's just normal, if you wake up, I mean. I was not gonna talk, becuase I wanted her to wake up all calm and in peace. I never wanted to alarm her. She woke up in silence, just like it was my intention.

_Words are meaningless  
And forgettable_

_Enjoy the silence_

"_Morning",_ she murmured. I gave her a bright smile, I had already lifted my head from her shoulders. I didn't want her to think I was attached to her in any way. She was still the girl from the beach I barely knew.

"_How was your sleep, Marissa?",_ I smiled back at her to see her reaction to my question. _"It was good. I didn't think a couch could bet hat relaxing. Thanks for letting me stay"_

"Well, you looked like you needed that, to be completely honest", I smirked back at the brunette. In reaction to that, she rolled her eyes, which she always did, but yet it didn't get annoying. Far from it, I found it cute. Especially when she started smiling afterwards. She got dimples when she smiled, just like me. I loved her smile, it was so soft and innocent, somehow. It really suited her and lightened her whole face. Obviously I liked her better smiling than moping around. But I knew it wasn't only moping, this girl really seemed broken inside.

_Vows are spoken  
To be Broken  
Feelings are intense  
Words are trivial  
Pleasures remain  
So does the pain_

I couldn't get this song out of my head. Damn it! I kept humming the melody. _"Did you say something?"_, Marissa asked me sprawling herself on the orange cloth of the couch. As if I heard a jingly noise I focused my thoughts on her. It was her voice, so clear and not as throaty as it was last night. _"No I-I was just um singing?!"_ I knew how silly that must have sounded. But against my expectations she didn't start laughing, she just nodded and said it was _cute_.

_Cute. _No one has ever called my weird habit _cute_, it was more like random and weird. I knew I wasn't going to have a big conversation with Marissa, she was never really talkative, it was mostly me who started babbling about nonsense.

I watched her for a few more minutes sitting on my couch silently. The way her hair fell into her face. It was brunette but with a slight tone of blond in it. Her eyes looked blue-grayish bur had a golden sparkle in the middle of her iris. Around her eyes she wore a lot of black make-up which was probably just smudged from sleeping. She put her hair back behind her ears and looked back at me.

"_So, do you wanna go out to eat?"_, I asked her politely. I let her stay at my office for the night, so why wouldn't I invite her to a breakfast, as well?

"_Breakfast?"_, She asked surprised. It was more a sense of unbelief, she actually sounded like she hadn't eaten breakfast for a long time and was pretty stunned that someone actually offered her one.

"_Yes, duuhh. Breakfast. You wanna go out with me?"_ One second after these words were spoken out loud I regretted them directly.

Marissa seemed like she wasn't too sure about her answer, well, probably because I made this sound really awkward. _"Um, I didn't mean it like that, I just…"_, _"Yeah, I know."_,she interrupted me. _"Ok, why not?! Let's go eat. My stomach could actually need something firm."_ She smiled as she accepted my invite. I could see a row of very white perfect teeth shine underneath her rosy lips. They were so sensual. Wow.

"_But are you feelin' alright? I mean…nausea? Something like that?"_,_ "Nope. Don't worry about it"_ She was always so determined. I thought I was supposed to be the one who was dominant and bossy, not her. Wow, did I just say _dominant_? Alright, there were definitely too many sexual vibes in this room. How could this girl turn me on so badly?

Well, I totally did not mind that fact. I knew I was bisexual when I was hmm like 15, or something. When I told my parents I was going to move in with my girlfriend they kicked me out and wanted me to leave for good. Apparently they weren't so chill about my new-found sexual orientation than I was. But I've grown into it and I'm aware that some people might feel intimidated by me. But that was only one of the issues I had to endure everyday. I felt comfortable with who I was. And that's what matters the most, right? I mean, it should be. Sometimes I felt so lost in this world, but then there were moments, which really made me believe that whatever I had done so far in my life, was right. This here was one of these moments, well, I guess.

I crawled away from the couch and stretched my arms. I was pretty tired out. Although I had one of the nicest dreams in like…ever.

I showed her to get up, as well. She made this face little children do when they don't wanna do what you tell 'em to. _"Aww, come on, Newport Princess. You need to get up, so we can get outta here."_,_ "Alright, alright. Miss…"_ I knew she was searching for some cocky insult, but she didn't seem to find a good one. _„…bartender"_ Ohhhh…burn. Now she really hurt me bad. Since I was such a bad bartender and it was such a low-standard job, which was, apparently, below her level. _"Wow, you so hurt me with that, I hope you're aware."_ I burst out into laughter. She tried to hard to be mean. No one was gonna believe her that bad-ass behavior. Well, I didn't. I always knew when people just tried to push everybody else away, because they don't want to get hurt themselves. Plus, Marissa just wasn't the type of girl who could keep up in a bad-ass battle with me, Alex Kelly. There was just no way for her to ever appear or even be more bad-ass than I was. She looked pretty pissed, because I wasn't taking her seriously. Well, how could I? With those freckles she had and the dimples she got when she finally forced herself to smile for once. She was just way too cute to appear bad.

"_Aww, I'm sorry, did I hurt your feelings, Barbie?"_ I really wanted to see what was happening next. Hopefully she didn't take it too serious, I mean, she didn't know me yet, she didn't know I just love to tease people.

"_You didn't and you won't. No one ever will, so you know what just fuck off okay?!"_ She was getting up and looked sort of upset. She walked across the room and it seemed like she was actually leaving. Without me.

Ughhh, fuck, she took it bad. I didn't even mean it like that. Fuck, this was definitively too much. _"Hey, Marissa. Don't go I didn't mean it like that."_ I really tried to stop her from leaving. But I couldn't force myself for an actual apology. She turned around very angrily. _"Then why did you even say it, huh? What is this? Stop fucking with my head, okay? This is not fucking funny"_, she said with a clear strong voice. She came closer and she still wore those angry glance. _"Don't mess with me, bartender." "Okay, okay, I got it." _I was a slight little bit confused and concerned. What was this with her and this_ pain _or_ hurting_?

I really couldn't see through this girl. But I think that's what drew me to her even more. She had something…mysterious, somehow.

"_Are you still coming with me to the diner?"_ I wasn't too sure about her answer, since she was standing fucking close to my face with the most pissed look I had ever seen. I have no idea why she freaked out that much. Maybe it had something to do with some past relationship, or whatever.

I heard her breathe loudly and relax a bit. Her whole body seemed to be in a kind of tense and I could literally see her melt._"Ugh, fine. I'm going with you. But only 'cuz I'm already starving."_ I smiled a bit, not too much, because I still knew how easily I could piss her off. She turned around again to walk out of my door. Then in a sudden movement she turned towards me again and whispered: _"Do not take me for granted."_

Wow, was she normal? There was definitely something up with this Newport chick. But I wasn't allowed to ask yet, that I knew.

"_I won't!"_ and I meant what I said.

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**So this is it :)**

**leave reviews please :D**


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